It’s Okay Not to Be Okay: Why Asking for Help Is a Sign of Strength

🌱 Introduction

Many of my clients have shared the heavy guilt they feel when they believe they’re not strong enough or don’t have everything together all the time. They often worry that showing their emotions will be seen as a weakness and feel pressured to hide what they’re truly experiencing.

We’ve all heard phrases like “be strong”, “just get on with it” or “keep it together,” but sometimes those words make us feel like we’re failing when life gets difficult to manage and we feel overwhelmed and less able to cope. The truth is, it’s completely okay not to be okay.

Struggling doesn’t mean you’re weak — it means you’re human. And one of the bravest things you can do when you’re not okay is to reach out and ask for help. In this post, we’ll explore why it’s normal to feel this way, why seeking support matters, and how to take that first step toward healing.

💭 1. Everyone Struggles — Even If It Doesn’t Show

In a world of social media, it’s easy to think everyone else has it together. But beneath the surface, everyone faces challenges — stress, grief, anxiety, burnout, loneliness.
You’re not alone in feeling lost or overwhelmed sometimes. Recognising that others struggle too helps remove shame and builds connection.

Try this: Next time you’re hard on yourself, pause and remind yourself, “I’m doing the best I can right now — and that’s enough.”

💬 2. The Pressure to “Be Fine”

Many of us grew up believing that showing emotions equals weakness. We say “I’m fine” even when we’re far from it, because we fear judgment or burdening others.
But emotions are signals, not flaws. Suppressing them only makes things heavier. Learning to express what’s really going on — even just to one trusted person — can be freeing.

“You don’t have to put on a brave face or be positive every moment. What matters most is allowing yourself to be genuine about how you’re feeling.”

🫶 3. Asking for Help Is Courageous, Not Weak

It takes real strength to admit you can’t do it all alone. Whether it’s reaching out to a friend, family member, or counsellor, asking for help is a powerful act of self-care.
You’re taking ownership of your wellbeing — and that’s something to be proud of.

Remember: You don’t have to wait until you’re at rock bottom to seek support. Counselling, or even talking to someone you trust can help you feel seen and understood sooner.

🌤️ 4. Steps You Can Take Today

If you’re struggling right now, here are a few small ways to start helping yourself:

• Talk to someone you trust about how you’ve been feeling
• Journal what’s been on your mind without judgment
• Take one small action — a walk, a shower, a deep breath
• Explore professional help — a therapist, counsellor, or support group
• Remind yourself: this moment is temporary; it will not define you

💚 5. You Deserve Support and Healing

Healing isn’t linear — it’s messy, slow, and uniquely yours. But you don’t have to do it alone.
Reaching out for help is a sign that you value your life and your wellbeing. It’s one of the most powerful things you can do for yourself.

“Being vulnerable is the birthplace of courage.” – Brené Brown

🌻 Conclusion

It’s okay to have hard days. It’s okay to cry, to feel lost, to not have all the answers.
What matters is that you keep showing up for yourself — even if that means reaching out and saying, “I’m not okay right now.”
That’s not weakness. That’s strength and honesty.

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📣 If You Need Support, Take Action: You’re Not Alone  

If you’re finding things difficult, please remember that help is always available. Reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness. Here are some trusted helplines you can contact any time:

• Lifeline (Northern Ireland): 0808 808 8000 (24/7, free and confidential)
• Samaritans: 116 123 (24/7, free from any phone)
• Shout: Text SHOUT to 85258 (24/7 crisis text support)
• NHS 111: Call 111 and select the mental health option for urgent help

You deserve support and understanding. If you’re struggling, please don’t hesitate to reach out to any of these services — someone is ready to listen and help you through.